Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Glittersnipe: GOP Jumped the Shark

Sharing the link and the cut and paste: this is so exactly brilliant and well spoken. I like to steal other's writings that reflect my own thoughts. Thank you glittersnipe. WBM

The theme song from Happy Days has been playing inside my head a lot recently. For anyone born after 1980, Happy Days was a hit sitcom in the 1970s that offered a nostalgic interpretation of 1950s America. It took place in Milwaukee, Wisconsin and centered around clean-cut teenager, Richie Cunningham (Ron Howard), and his family. Richie’s good friend was Arthur “The Fonz” Fonzarelli (Henry Winkler) who was curiously tough for his small size, and drew women to him, literally, with a snap.
No doubt, Barack Obama and Mitt Romney would give their eye teeth to have Fonzie’s effect on female voters this November. Romney’s VP pick, Paul Ryan, a Wisconsin boy himself, certainly sent some women swooning in the first days following his addition to the ticket. The piercing blue eyes, the serious hair, the P90x physique, and the devoted family man image are hard to ignore, to be sure. Little more than a week after the announcement, however, Ryan was on the receiving end of a female firestorm the likes of which hasn’t been seen since thrice-divorced family values expert and Bovine-American Rush Limbaugh called law student, Sandra Fluke a slut for speaking in favor of insurance coverage for birth control pills.
So what exactly caused the sudden disenchantment with Ryan? The hubbub was over Ryan’s connection and shared views with Missouri Representative Todd Akin — you know, Mr. “Legitimate” Rape? Akin and Ryan have cosponsored eight anti-choice bills in Congress; one of them (HR 212) gives fertilized eggs the same constitutional rights as people. This “Sanctity of Life Bill” would thereby render many birth control methods illegal, as well as criminalize in vitro fertilization since embryos are sometimes compromised in the process. Lest you think that Akin and Ryan acted alone, you should know that there are sixty-four cosponsors of this bill. All of them are Republican. And fifty-eight of them are men. Say what?
Goodbye grey sky, hello blue / There’s nothing can hold me when I hold you / Feels so right, it can’t be wrong / Rockin’ and rollin’ all week long.
In 1957, the average woman gave birth to 3.8 children. She was also a homemaker, or what we would today call a stay-at-home mom. After 1960, when the birth control pill was approved by the FDA for contraception, the average number of children per household began to fall. By 2011, that number dropped to two children born per average woman. Many mothers today work outside the home, sometimes by choice, but often by necessity, as the middle class cost of living has increased dramatically more than their salaries have over the past few decades. So what would happen if suddenly many forms of birth control were to become illegal? Hand over those IUDs and pills, ladies. It’s condoms, diaphragms or the rhythm method for you. Good luck! I hope your daycare offers a discount for siblings!
Mitt Romney has said that he is in support of overturning Roe v. Wade and letting states call the shots on abortion laws. If he is elected president and gets to appoint conservative Supreme Court justices, that is a very real possibility. The problem is that outlawing abortion won’t keep it from happening. It will only make it riskier.
In 1965, The National Center for Health Statistics cited 235 deaths reported from abortions that year. Of course the unreported number is likely much higher as abortion was not made legal until 1973.
Or just ask Romania. When the dictator, Nicolae Ceaucescsu came to power in 1965, his government outlawed abortion. The death rate for Romanian women having abortions rose 600 percent by 1982. In 1990, abortion was made legal again in Romania, and by 1996 the death rate had returned to pre-1965 levels.
Mitt Romney As The Fonze
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Legal abortion does not mean more abortions. In 2006,  Belgium, Germany, the Netherlands, and Switzerland, where abortion is legal, had an average rate among them of 6 abortions per 1,000 reproductive-aged women. In the United States that rate was 21 abortions per 1,000 reproductive-aged women. Meanwhile in places like the Dominican Republic, Peru, the Philippines and Uganda where abortion is illegal, abortion rates averaged 46 per 1,000 reproductive-aged women. The difference is education, and the availability of contraception. Outlawing abortion and limiting access to birth control will only serve to increase the number of abortions, as well as the number of women who will die from them.
One would think that alleged budget hawks like Romney and Ryan, who want to severely restrict entitlement programs, would see the pragmatism in granting more access to contraception — not less.
In 2000, 57 percent of abortions were for poor and low-income women. A total of 857,475 abortions were reported to the CDC in 2000, so that’s 488,761 additional children that would have required public assistance that year. Paul Ryan’s budget calls for a $46 billion cut in Medicaid, $36 million cut from food stamps, and drops 300,000 kids from the school lunch program. You do the math on how to support a growing number of children living in or near poverty with those numbers, because Ryan can’t, or won’t.
Paul Ryan’s disconnect from logic on this point is directly related to the two primary influences on his world view: The Catholic Church, and the author and self-styled philosopher, Ayn Rand. These two major influences could not be more antithetical. The Catholic Church is staunchly pro-life; against both abortion and contraception. However, the Catholic Church is also the largest charitable organization on the planet. Caring for the sick and the poor is paramount in the Church’s teachings. Meanwhile, Ayn Rand, whose Atlas Shrugged is required reading for Ryan’s staff members, was rabidly pro-choice and believed that there was no moral duty to help others; furthermore according to Objectivism (the Randian philosophy to which Ryan subscribes), altruism is actually a sign of weakness.
Unfortunately, and most confounding to many of us, is the result of the marriage of these conflicting viewpoints. All human life (no matter how few cells) is precious and must be saved without exception; until, of course, you are born and then you are on your own, kid. Get a job, little baby! Sadly, while Ryan is the poster boy, he certainly isn’t alone in this thinking. It pervades today’s Republican Party: forget the infant who requires Medicaid for basic medical care. All hail the zygote!
Make no mistake: No one is “pro-abortion.” We would all like to see the number of abortions drastically reduced, but we disagree on how to achieve that goal. Statistics have shown that outlawing abortion won’t make it go away, and it won’t even reduce it significantly. Education and readily available contraception will. And yet, Republicans are seeing to it that low income and uninsured women — those very women for whom an unplanned pregnancy could spell economic disaster — will not have contraception readily available to them.
Mitt Romney says that he will “get rid of” Planned Parenthood. Republican Congressmen have already attempted to defund Planned Parenthood, with H.R. 614. “Title X Abortion Provider Prohibition Act” which would prohibit any federal grants to be allocated to any entity that provides abortions. Never mind that in 2010, abortion services only comprised three percent of all that Planned Parenthood did. Defunding Planned Parenthood would deny millions of uninsured and under-insured women cancer screenings and preventative care, STD testing, contraception, and prenatal services. So between Romney’s promises to “get rid of” both Planned Parenthood and Obamacare, poor and lower income women and their children can look forward to a level of neglect unconscionable for an industrialized nation — let alone one that prides itself on being exceptional.
The clock is being turned back on women, and it is happening quickly. Women gained freedom in the 1960s with the advent of the birth control pill: they can delay having children until they are ready. With that reproductive freedom, women can have their own careers and thereby be financially independent. Planned Parenthood allows college women and women just starting off in their careers, the necessary health screenings and contraception they cannot yet afford on their own. It sets up young women to be able to compete in a man’s world.
In this recent power play by the right, women are being told that they won’t be making their own reproductive choices any more. Their options will be limited to what Big Daddy thinks is best. It’s a return to the fifties without the benefit of Eisenhower’s moderation or progressive vision.
Sunday, Monday, happy days / Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days / Thursday, Friday, happy days / Saturday, what a day / Groovin’ all week with you.
In the fifth season premiere episode of Happy Days, which aired in September 1977, the central characters visit Los Angeles. While at the beach, the Fonz decides to face his fear of sharks by jumping over one on water skis. He does this in his trademark black leather jacket and a pair of swim trunks. This absurd departure from previous seasons, which had featured more typically adolescent conundrums, signaled the beginning of the end for the show. As a result, the idiom “jumped the shark” was coined to indicate the point at which something has crossed the line into absurdity and is unable to fully recover.
At this close range, it’s difficult to pinpoint the exact moment when the Republican Party jumped the shark. For me personally, it was the nomination of George W. Bush in 2000. I had always halfheartedly voted Republican before, but his nomination over John McCain was an immediate deal breaker. After that, the Republicans seemed to lose their way as they veered and careened further right throughout the Bush presidency. Moderates got pushed out of the Party or forced to be silent while Evangelical Christians and later, the Tea Party, began to wrangle control.
However, nothing compares to the recent folly of trying to snatch back fifty years of female progress. Women will not tolerate old men, ignorant of simple biological facts, lecturing us about what we can and cannot do with our bodies. We will not cede legal control of our own reproductive health, because doing so makes us second class citizens. In a time when women are still only making 77 cents for every dollar a man earns, we cannot afford to go backwards. And we won’t.
This election is a desperate attempt by Republicans to regain control. The Party of Lincoln used to be a Big Tent party with enough room for people of many different backgrounds. But their recent exclusionary tactics of strict immigration reform and anti-gay legislation have positioned them as the Angry White People Party. They know that their majority is waning and that each election will be harder for them to win.
And now they want to mess with women? Come November, they will learn that was their biggest mistake yet.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Religion Sucks

Just putting this out there; probably shouldn't but y'all know me...

It has been a long time coming, but I have concluded that I despise religion. Despise It.

Now let me explain, if you are able to see straight after the last sentence.  I have no problem with faith. I have no problem with belief. I have no problem with any individual's higher being; no matter the rendition. I have no problem with an individual's right to express their personal belief and practice their specific religion. If what you believe makes you a better person, helps you make good decisions, makes you a compassionate contributing member of this planet... then I'm perfectly fine with your beliefs.

I do however have a huge issue with people who claim to be part of a specific religion (and the name or deity does not matter to me) who get their panties all in a bundle because my definitions and beliefs do not exactly to the letter coincide with theirs and then they have the audacity to tell me I am not "christian" or I'm hateful  or think that gives them the right to govern my life based upon their so called belief principles. I loathe the continued atrocities committed in the name of religion; the discrimination, hatred, bigotry and exclusion-ism.

I'm not fond of extremists and they do exist in every religion; so back off the Muslim faith because there are plenty of extremists of all faiths to go around. Some "christains", I'm sure would still prefer to force others into their religion even if it decimates a gentle culture and brings disease and death to the so called "heathens".

I've had enough with people who believe in the Bible; every literal word. I don't argue that it was written by God's prophets and that it is his "word" and it should be studied and respected. However, to really understand every word of that book you would need to be a scholar with fluent abilities in every language that each part was written. Then you would have to be an expert of every culture and every social nuance prevalent at the time it was written and then you would have to be a mind reader; God's mind. Scholars disagree on the minutiae of the good book. How would anyone expect to fully know this writing? Most people take bits and phrases of it out of context to fit their ideals.

This ultra extreme conservative energy that is running through our wonderful Nation is making me ill. There is good reason to separate church and state. How many oppressed religious sects got the hell out of Europe, selling themselves as indentured servants for the passage across the Atlantic in a crappy boat, just so they could get away from some king who killed them for their beliefs?  The same damn king who bought favors with the clergy to change the rules so he could kill his wife and have another.

A motivator in finally starting my blog several months ago was a wonderful friend from high school, who I love to his core.  He become so pissed at my postings regarding the discrimination of LGBT people, of the GOP wanting in women's uterus and wanting to send women in the country back 40 years due to their "religious faith" that he disowned me. He said I was not a christian and that I was the most hateful person he had ever known and a barrage of other heated comments. Poof, over thirty years of friendship gone.  Now I felt pretty sheepish when this happened. Yep, I felt like shit, like he might have a point. I figured that a cooling off period would allow us to talk about it eventually.

But really, he couldn't see that I was anti-people-who-hate-and-use-religion-as-their-justification? He took what I was trying to convey out of context and assumed I was talking about him and all "christians" in general. Horse shit. This is an excellent man, who is raising 4 strong boys in a god loving manner. He has gone on many mission trips to build schools etc in very poor Central American communities.  His family has taken in a psychologically troubled teen and are struggling to find the best way to reach her and make her feel safe and loved.  He struggles with his faith, trying to be a better person in God's eye. How on earth, with me knowing him so well, could he accuse me of hating him because he is "christian".  A man like him is part of the 99% or 47% or what ever the magic number is this week, that proves their goodness and faith on a daily basis through their actions; not blah blahing bits of out of context, bible nonesense.

Also had quite a conversation several years ago with a young woman regarding Iran and the root of the troubles America has with that country. I had the wonderful opportunity to hear 2003 Nobel Peace Prize winner, Shirin Ebadi speak at Meredith College and also read her book, Iran Awakening. After spending an evening discussing facts, this young girl piped up and said, "They are all wrong" in reference that if they are not christian then they are wrong. Fully dismissed facts because it didn't fit in her stupid little religious definition. Wow. Don't fit the definition and you are on the street. I no longer have any respect for this girl. 

I blame religion. I blame the expectation of pure and exact conformity demanded by whoever the whack job at the front of the pulpit happens to be. Every building has a slightly different definition, every person inside that building has a slightly different definition. How can anyone anywhere expect total and complete and exact adherence to some arbitrary set of rules? How? 

This issue screams of hypocrisy. All the lip service to emulating Jay-zus and loving your neighbor while simultaneously dismissing those who aren't your robotic religious equal as not worthy of compassion, understanding, equal rights, autonomous thought... well the list goes on.

So getting back to the trigger for writing this today, all these months after my friend disowned me.  I am putting together my 30 year high school reunion. Have not heard from this friend regarding his attendance, so I noticed his wife (who is quite lovely) online and IMd her. Very short and terse, "He doesn't want to go". My immediate self-deprecating thought, "Yeah, because I, the christian hater, will be there." I am making the reason up and am hoping I am wrong.

Friday, August 3, 2012

COH; sharing an article with you


Monday, July 2, 2012

Boys are Stupid, Throw Rocks at Them. Steven Two's Resolution

 A little follow-up on the Boys are Stupid saga.  After all the graduation parties were complete, Steven two was still being silent which was driving my daughter mad.  We had already purchased a custom (ie I couldn't take it back) graduation/18th birthday gift. So on the evening of his birthday, she took it to his home. Little did she know, I had attached the following "Words of Wisdom" to the gift (the version below has been edited). Between what she told him and my bit of advice, that poor child felt like a huge steamy pile of manure. He promised he would never treat someone so callously again and admitted that he acted immaturely.  Two days later, on my girl's 18th, he showed up with the prettiest sapphire and diamond pendant and a self-baked chocolate cake. That boy has great taste in jewelry and some lucky person will benefit greatly in his future. The girl, however, was giddy over the cake. You see the hoarding upbringing did not involve home baked birthday cakes so I've not done that for my children. She put a note on the cake warning all who covet it of a painful death if they dare touch it. At this point they are talking and hanging out very briefly with the help of the wing man and his lovely girlfriend as buffers. It is better. My girl is happy to have her friend again.

"Dear Steven,

I just want to let you know you are not the stereotype you portray.  The first time you came to our home, you introduced yourself as an “ass” which I found endearing. I understand the need to preface an introduction with a disclaimer. I do the same thing. You are, however, neither an ass nor are you the narcissistic, cocky, dumb, horny jock that people believe you are. You do not have to be that person. You do not have to fulfill others expectations of what they believe you are.  I did not see those negative qualities in you at all; only that you think you should be that way.

What do I see in you? I see a shy handsome young man who is figuring out his future, the same as most 18 year olds. I see someone who is smart, funny, quick witted, quiet and calm. You are a very hard working and dedicated tri athlete. If you continue to apply this level of dedication in other aspects of your life, it will serve you very well.  Paradoxically, you also quit when you think the goal is unacheivable; it is easier to callously give up than try and fail.  She lit up when she was with you. You surrendered.  That giving up to avoid failure will not serve you. I see that the conflict you have within yourself as to who people expect you to be, who you really are, and what you want to achieve, is causing a bit of depression.  You know that moody pms-ing bitch thing you do; delightful one minute and cut off silent the next; making your friends walk on eggshells because they don’t want to upset you and send you into that sullen place?  It does not serve you.  I see that you are trying to figure out girls and want a girlfriend, but aren’t sure what the right approach is to fulfill that goal. I do not think you are a slut, whore or user. How could you be when you were too shy to even attempt to kiss my awesome daughter?

I will tell you that if you continue to try to be that idiot others expect of you, you won’t find a good mature relationship.  You will pass by smart, intelligent wonderful people who can fulfill so much more than your hormone filled boyhood lust to get laid.  You will end up with shallow girls who mean nothing to you emotionally and will still leave you feeling empty and alone as soon as the orgasm is over.  Once again, this goes back to feeling as though you need to be what others think you are. 

I will also let you know that ignoring her because you were no longer interested in dating her or hanging out with her or knowing she wasn’t going to have sex with you was lame. She actually likes you for you. She thought highly of your friendship with or without any physical contact.  Turning cold without reason is very confusing and hurtful.  This my friend, is why I have told her since she was three to consider very carefully before having sex; boys who leave because they didn’t get laid, will leave anyway once they do. That is one stereotype you need to purge.  Reach down deep, become a big boy and just tell the next girl you lose interest in face to face. Have some testicular fortitude and do the uncomfortable and right thing by having a mature conversation.  Plain and simple.

In a few short weeks, you will have a fantastic opportunity to throw off the preconceived stereotype that people have of you and become whoever you want to be. No longer should you feel obligated to be the narcissistic, cocky, dumb, horny jock. Get rid of that idiot; put forth those other wonderful traits that are you and become the exceptional adult you are capable of being. 

I wish you only the best and look forward to the smart, funny, quick witted, charming adult Steven who becomes who he wants to be and not what others expect of him.  Congratulations on your graduation and enjoy your 18th Birthday.

With love and fondness,"

Thoughts on my letter to him? This could be a whole other blog post. I vacillate between thinking this was a good thing to do and being too much in my daughter's business. In the end, of course, he received the letter. Most adults don't have candid conversations with their children or treat their children's peers as mature thinking human beings.  I think someone had to spell this out to Steven. He really is a wonderful person and now I think he will be even more wonderful if he keeps my Sage Advice According to Whit!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

The Hoarding Mother; graduation party

So my daughter had her high school graduation party this past weekend. My mother, who has the Hoffman Hoard in the Mitten and is working on another in the great state of Virginia, emailed to say she was going to "try" to make the party. She would be driving from Virginia which is about 5.5 hours via car from my home. She also needed to know of some nearby, inexpensive hotels where she could stay. I've long ago given up trying to appease her need to be begged with to "stay" or participate in any family gathering, thus I provided her with several options. One was a Motel 8; her reply, "I've heard those are nasty filthy".  Yes, the hoarder has standards that apply to everyone except her. Another reason for her to not stay in my 3,300 sq ft home, and she didn't say a word to me, but spread it to others, my in-laws were already staying here. She doesn't like them, go figure.  She also ran her little Nellie Negative tongue about having to see my college room mate and her family. She just can't give up a comment made by an 18 year old kid 30 years ago about my  sisters' (ages 12 and 13) behavior. OMG, get over it already.

The evening before the party, she calls from the road. She is "somewhere" in North Carolina. Incapable of telling me how long she has been in the state, what road she is on or what town she is near. She has driven here before, there are only three roads needed to navigate. She has a GPS, but no one will show her how to use it, so she is going to use her OnStar; but she doesn't like those bitches because they won't stay online and talk to her for the entire journey. I ask her if she is going to stop by the house. She can't because she is sweaty, stinks and needs a shower, but I can call her at the hotel which is about 6 miles from my house. I tell her that I'll just see her the next morning.

Next morning, she calls sounding terribly pitiful and on the verge of death. She doesn't know what she ate, but has a case of diarrhea and has been puking since arriving at the hotel. I tell her she can go back to bed and get some rest or come to the house and rest here. She has to think about it. Four hours later she drives up in her Chevy HHR; that car is a whole other topic. She waddles out, acting all cripple, feeble and helpless.  She wrinkled her nose at the food being served; sub sandwiches, baked mac n cheese and a nice selection of vegetarian Indian food. She tried a bit of a samosa giving it "stink face" the whole time. After about one hour, her HHR pulls out of the driveway. Not one word to me, just leaves.  I guess she did say good-bye to my daughter, telling her that she was going to be sick. A whole hour; we made bets before she arrived at how long it would take her to throw a snit and storm out. Thankfully there was no scene this time.

The next morning I called to see if she was going to stop by.  Ha, she was already on the road half-way back to Virginia. So much for a wasted trip.

Does your hoarder have some of these issues?

  • Negative attitude toward everyone
  • Cannot give up or forgive transgression from decades ago
  • Pretends to be helpless
  • Has tantrums and storms away
  • Leaves without saying goodbye
  • Will not try new things

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Boys are Stupid, Throw Rocks at Them.


Boys are stupid and quite possibly deserve rocks thrown at them. Were boys this stupid 30 years ago? Probably. Oh who's kidding who, of course they were. 

I feel so deeply for my child having to navigate the world of dating. My beautiful, intelligent, artful, sensitive, witty child had the fortune or misfortune of two prom dates this year. Two very different young men and two different schools. 

The first boy, Dave calls him Steven, asked her via a German word puzzle given to her in class. I think the teacher was in on the plan. Clever batman. He is a classmate. Was an acquaintance, really. She had already planned to go to prom date-free with a gang. After all, no need to waste time waiting for a boy to get up the nerve to ask. The dress was already purchased. It was not a romantic endeavor.  He is really very smart. Was part of a group that designed and competed with robots that play basket ball. Going into robotics engineering for college. He is one of those classic "geeky" boys. He has lovely blue eyes hidden behind glasses and truly a "purdy mouth." The kinky curly hair is not so great, but if he keeps it short, it looks alright.

The second boy, Dave calls him Steven, goes to a different high school but they went to elementary together and I hear my girl used to beat him up on the playground.  He asked her by spelling p-r-o-m in his french fries while his wing-man distracted her with a game of pool at a sports bar.  Was with a group of boys watching the March Madness basket ball finals. Her father and I had been telling her for a month or more that Steven was going to ask her to prom. She didn't believe us, insisting that he just came over to watch TV with her when he was bored. At that time, Steven Two knew about Steven One, but not the reverse. In her mind, this was not a romantic endeavor either due to her discussions with Steven Two. Steven Two is a classic jock. He swims year round, competes in triathlons, works out hours every day. He wants to be a Navy Seal. He is smart; not typical of a jock. He is also a temperamental, moody little PMS-er at times. He is a self proclaimed "ass" which was rather endearing to me. As my girl describes him, ""Your ego is so big that there's no room for your self esteem". So yeah, big ego and no self esteem. Actually kinda cute with the big old studly jock persona and this shy "I'm fat" thought pattern underneath. Did I mention he is hot? Or as we said thirty years ago, a fox.

I somehow managed to raise my daughter with a bit of a conscience and empathy. She didn't want to "date" both of them at the same time. The pressure these days to click the "relationship" box on FB is huge. I explained that she did not have to choose.  However, somewhere along the line Steven Two asked her to be exclusive; even though he knew that prom with Steven One had yet to happen. She told him, in consideration of Steven One, she couldn't be exclusive until after his prom. Of course, Steven One asked her to be exclusive too. By this point, she liked Steven One because of their commonalities, but had come to the conclusion that there was no romantic interest, so she declined. She had also decided that there really was some chemistry with Stephen Two.

Forward a month.  Steven One is like the "tide" according to Dave. Will always be there, taking his time, slowly wearing away at the shore along with the phases of the moon. Wearing her down and not giving up. He's getting better looking to me as time goes on. Spent some time with the two of them together last week. I have to say, I'm not fond of their conversations. All the racist bigotry sexual crap that passes as humor between them, kinda made me sad. I thought I had instilled better ... better into her. So a little less impressed with him, as I don't see them enhancing each others best qualities, but inflaming their worst. Just not respectful (we hate that word in our house because of its misuse as in this case) with each other.

Steven Two has been MIA except for one night that she went out with his mom and some friends to bowl. MIA. Thought it was because of his triathlon participation/training and her full AP exam schedule. Turns out, the studly virginal jock who is too shy or macho to even KISS the girl has moved on because of course, he wanted a little more action than he was going to get. Dumb Ass thinks he's going to get a blow job or sex when he can't even initiate a kiss?  C'est la vie, been preparing her since she was three for that kind of pig.  

What really lights my fire, is how navigating the world of stupid boys affects my girl. She is sad about the whole situation and especially Steven Two's lack of gonads to even talk to her. The inability of boys these days to have a conversation face to face with a girl regarding their "relationship" status is incredible. Why don't boys have any ability at all to be honest and forthright? I know my daughter is because I gave her that example; good and bad depending on your perspective. 

What crushes her is the loss of a friend. Intellectually, she gets the horny hormones of stupid boys and is glad she doesn't have sex with them.  Sex or not, dumb boys with that mindset are going to be short lived anyway. What her heart can't grasp is why the friendship meant nothing and thus why she means nothing. It is the feeling of nothingness that drags her down. She wasn't born to be treated like that and I can only sit by watching her painfully try to navigate the stupidity of boys. 

Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them.

(So this is really my first attempt. Was more a rant, as I expect most of my blogs to be. Also too long and wordy, I suspect. Will try to get better with that. Comment to help me improve.)

Friday, May 4, 2012

Let Me Introduce Myself

Welcome here. Expect the unexpected. Expect bold in your face statements of life according to Whit.  You may not like what I say, but I ask you to think about it. I don't need to change your mind, you don't need to change mine, but at least we can have some dialogue and try to appreciate each others' point of view.

I will definitely talk about hoarding and family relationships. I used to shy away from politics and religion, but I feel the atmosphere in this country is diseased so we must speak up or accept what is handed to us. I don't accept the party line any longer. So yes, I'm gonna give my opinion on religion and politics. We may disagree, but once again, I believe it is possible to share views in a spirited manner without resorting to name calling and "unfriending" each other. Lets face it, you came to my blog, I did not come to you.

I believe I grew up with undiagnosed ADD.  I would just blurt out what I thought. It got me into a lot of trouble as a kid.  I've always spoken up, described the elephant in the room in great detail. I went through a stage when I didn't understand people's reaction to me. I thought I was broken which isn't so good for the self-esteem.  As I've gotten older I realize that most people are just very uncomfortable with the truth; or at least the obvious. It was not until I was in my 20's that I started to use a filter between my brain and mouth. Yes, I've learned to filter, but mostly to prevent hurting some one's feelings, not to suppress the truth. I've been told I'm an old wise soul; even as a little kid. People come to me for advice. I've never understood why, just kind of shrugged my shoulders and accepted it. You will know where you stand with me. Brutally honest. Blunt.

I grew up in a hoard. My life didn't start that way, it devolved. Lots of dysfunction, but it formed who I am and my scars haven't crippled me. Lying and keeping secrets, I have learned allows those secrets to become more than they are; more than they need to be. Secrets and lies take over your life. They run parallel to hoarding.

My dear NOLA COH buddies get a shout out; for they encouraged me to do this. Don't know what it will look like, don't know who will read it, don't know if it will help or will hurt. Let the ride begin.